When most couples start planning their wedding, they quickly realize there are more options than just a traditional wedding.
Maybe you’ve found yourself scrolling through photos of couples exchanging vows on mountaintops with no one else around. Or maybe you’re imagining an intimate dinner with your closest family after saying “I do.”
Both sound incredible.
So how do you decide between a micro wedding and an elopement?
The truth is, there isn’t a right answer.
Both create meaningful, intentional wedding days. The biggest difference isn’t the guest count—it’s the experience you want to have.
If you’re trying to decide which one feels most like you, here’s everything you should know.
What Is an Elopement?
Forget everything you’ve heard about eloping in secret.
Modern elopements are intentionally planned wedding days centered around your relationship instead of a traditional wedding timeline.
Some couples hike to an alpine lake for sunrise. Others exchange vows beneath towering redwoods, explore the Oregon Coast, share a picnic in the mountains, or spend the evening around a campfire watching the stars.
Some don’t hike at all.
They book a beautiful Airbnb, enjoy a slow morning together, exchange vows overlooking the ocean, and celebrate with a private chef dinner.
An elopement isn’t defined by where you get married.
It’s defined by the freedom to create a day that’s completely your own.
Most elopements include anywhere from just the couple to around 15–20 guests.
One of my favorite things about photographing elopements is that no two days ever look the same.
I’ve photographed couples exchanging vows beside alpine lakes in Grand Teton National Park, saying “I do” beneath towering evergreens in Colorado, and exploring the Oregon Coast after their ceremony with nothing on the schedule except enjoying the day together.
Some couples hike for miles. Others choose locations just a short walk from the parking area. Some spend the afternoon kayaking, horseback riding, or sharing a picnic, while others simply want to soak in the scenery and have an unrushed day together.
That’s what I love most about elopements. They’re built around your relationship, not a timeline you’re expected to follow.
What Is a Micro Wedding?
A micro wedding blends the intimacy of an elopement with many of the traditions of a traditional wedding.
Most micro weddings include around 10 to 50 guests, though there’s no official number.
You’ll often still have things like:
- A ceremony
- Family portraits
- A reception
- Dinner
- Toasts
- First dances
- Cake cutting
The biggest difference is that your guest list stays intentionally small.
Instead of trying to celebrate with everyone you’ve ever known, you’re spending your day with the people who have played the biggest role in your lives.
What’s the Biggest Difference?
Rather than thinking about guest count, imagine how your wedding day unfolds.
Picture waking up in a cozy cabin tucked away in the mountains. You make breakfast together, sip coffee on the porch, and take your time getting ready without watching the clock. After exchanging private vows overlooking an alpine lake, you spend the afternoon exploring nearby trails, stopping whenever you find a view you love, and ending the day with dinner as the sun sets behind the mountains.
That’s the beauty of an elopement. The day unfolds at your pace, and every decision revolves around the two of you.
Now picture a micro wedding. You still get those quiet moments together, but you also share them with the people who matter most. Your parents see you for the first time before the ceremony. Your grandparents are there to celebrate. You linger over dinner with your closest friends, laugh through heartfelt toasts, and end the evening surrounded by the people who’ve been part of your story.
Both experiences are deeply meaningful. They simply create different kinds of memories. The question isn’t which one is better. It’s which one feels more like you.
Should You Elope or Have a Micro Wedding?
Ask yourselves this question:
When you picture your wedding day five years from now, what do you hope you remember most?
If your answer is…
“Just the two of us standing on a mountain at sunrise.”
An elopement might be exactly what you’re looking for.
If your answer is…
“Having dinner with our parents and grandparents after our ceremony.”
A micro wedding may feel more meaningful.
Your answer doesn’t have to be based on what anyone else expects.
You Don’t Actually Have to Choose
One of the biggest misconceptions I hear from couples is that they have to choose between having an intimate elopement and celebrating with the people they love. They picture it as an either-or decision: it’s either just the two of us, or we invite our family.
The truth is, you don’t have to choose.
One of my favorite ways to help couples plan their wedding is by blending the two experiences. By spreading your celebration over two days, you can have the privacy and adventure of an elopement while still creating meaningful memories with your closest family and friends.
Option One: A Private Adventure Day
Imagine waking up before sunrise together.
You make coffee at your Airbnb while the mountains are still quiet.
You drive to your ceremony location, exchange private vows with no one else around, and spend the day exploring somewhere you’ve always dreamed of visiting.
Maybe you hike.
Maybe you paddle across an alpine lake.
Maybe you stop for tacos after your ceremony before watching sunset from a scenic overlook.
There’s no audience.
No schedule packed with obligations.
Just the two of you experiencing one of the biggest days of your lives together.
Option Two: Celebrate with Family the Next Day
The following day looks completely different.
Your parents arrive.
Your siblings are there.
Your grandparents get to watch you exchange rings.
You enjoy dinner together, listen to heartfelt toasts, share your first dance, and celebrate with the people who helped shape your story.
Instead of feeling like you had to choose between your family and your own experience, you get both.
I love this approach because it allows you to experience both sides of your wedding day without feeling like you’re sacrificing one for the other. You still get the adventure, the privacy, and the intentional moments that make elopements so special, while also creating lasting memories with the people who mean the most to you.
For many couples, it ends up feeling like the best of both worlds.
Common Myths About Elopements and Micro Weddings
“Eloping means we can’t invite anyone.”
Not true.
Many couples invite parents, siblings, grandparents, or a handful of close friends.
You can absolutely share your day with loved ones while keeping it intimate.
“A micro wedding is just a small traditional wedding.”
Sometimes.
But it can also look completely different.
I’ve seen couples host dinner at a cozy Airbnb, rent a private cabin in the mountains, or gather everyone at a beautiful overlook before ending the evening around a fire.
A micro wedding doesn’t have to follow a traditional wedding timeline if that’s not what feels right to you.
“We’ll disappoint people if we elope.”
This is probably the biggest fear couples share with me.
The reality is that the people who love you most usually want you to have a wedding day that feels true to your relationship.
That doesn’t mean every decision will be easy, but your wedding shouldn’t become about making everyone else happy.
Which One Is More Expensive?
One of the biggest misconceptions is that elopements are always less expensive than micro weddings.
The reality is, it depends on the experience you’re creating.
A micro wedding often includes many of the same elements as a traditional wedding—just on a smaller scale. You might still choose to rent a venue, host a catered dinner, hire a florist, or spend the evening celebrating with your closest family and friends. With a smaller guest list, couples often have the flexibility to invest more into each guest’s experience, whether that’s an incredible meal, thoughtful details, or a beautiful place to gather.
An elopement simply shifts where that investment goes.
Instead of planning around a reception, many couples choose to invest in experiences they’ll remember for years to come. That could mean renting a cozy cabin in the mountains, spending several days exploring a destination together, hiring a private chef, booking a helicopter tour, or adding activities like horseback riding, kayaking, or a Jeep adventure to their wedding day.
Neither option is necessarily more expensive than the other. They simply reflect different priorities.
If celebrating with your closest family over an unforgettable dinner feels most meaningful, a micro wedding may be the perfect fit. If you’d rather spend the day exploring somewhere you’ve always dreamed of visiting, an elopement might be exactly what you’re looking for.
At the end of the day, it’s less about spending less money and more about spending your budget on the moments you’ll remember most.
Which Wedding Style Is Right for You?
If you’re still deciding between a micro wedding and an elopement, take a moment to stop thinking about guest counts, timelines, and logistics. Instead, picture your wedding day from beginning to end.
What does your ideal day look like?
Maybe you imagine exchanging private vows on a quiet mountaintop before spending the rest of the day exploring together. Maybe you picture sharing dinner with your parents and closest friends after saying “I do.” Or maybe your dream day includes both, with an intimate adventure followed by a celebration with the people you love most.
There isn’t a right or wrong answer because every couple values something different. Some couples feel most at home surrounded by family, while others crave the quiet, uninterrupted moments that come from having a day centered entirely around the two of them.
Your wedding doesn’t have to follow someone else’s expectations or fit neatly into a certain category. It should feel like an honest reflection of your relationship and the way you want to begin your marriage.
At the end of the day, the best wedding isn’t measured by how many people attended or how closely it followed tradition. It’s measured by how it felt. When you look back years from now, I hope you remember more than just the details. I hope you remember the laughter, the quiet moments together, the people you shared it with, and the feeling of knowing your wedding day was exactly what the two of you wanted it to be.
Ready to Start Planning?
Whether you’re dreaming of a mountaintop elopement, an intimate wedding surrounded by your favorite people, or a two-day celebration that combines both, I’d love to help you create a day that’s completely your own.
From choosing the perfect location and building a personalized timeline to finding places to stay and documenting every meaningful moment, I’m here to help make the planning process feel simple and exciting.
If that sounds like the kind of wedding day you’re envisioning, I’d love to hear what you’re dreaming up. Reach out through my contact page, and let’s start planning an experience that feels uniquely yours.
